Some funny newspaper stories from today's tabloids ...
GUILTY PLEASURE
Jobless Terry Thurling, 27, was jailed for four months for stealing eight vibrators from a sex shop in Canterbury, Kent.
SEX EDUCATION
A teacher accidentally beamed porn on a screen seen by kids of eight at posh Pennthorpe School in Rudgwick, West Sussex.
THANK BRUNO
New comic film Bruno, starring Sacha Baron Cohen as a gay Austrian Tv presenter, has led to a 120 per cent rise in inquiries by Brits for hotels in the country.
GRAVE STONED
Junkies are harvesting opium from poppies growing in a church garden in Waterloo, south London.
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