Thursday 15 September 2011

Funny newspaper stories

Funny newspaper stories and funny newspaper headlines from today's papers ..

DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES
Jealous wives have launched a petition against a blonde barmaid, claiming she's too sexy to serve their husbands in Cadelbosco di Spora, Italy.

CRIME WATCH
A thief who swallowed a British tourist's £10,000 diamond watch was nicked after he was X-rayed in Marbella, Spain.

BUTT HEAD
Hunter Boris Adamski shot himself dead trying to finish off a raccoon with the butt of his rifle in Chelyabinsk, Russia.

Wednesday 14 September 2011

Scoop6 and other dodgy bets

I actually got a coupon up on Saturday. Honestly, I did. A four-fold as well. 4 homes it was with Blackpool, Southampton, Morton and Cowdenbeath all producing the goods.

Clearly I'm on a roll so a Champions League 4-folds it is tonight. My money's on Man Utd, Man City, Basel and Inter Milan.

Newspaper headlines

What's makingthenews today? All the newspaper headlines and football gossip from today's newspapers ...

Celtic stars Scott Brown and Anthony Stokes will miss the club's Europa League trip to Atletico Madrid through injury.
The Sun

Bolton have reportedly flown in right-back Stefano Magnasco to train with them for two weeks. They hope to agree a deal to sign him from Chile's Universidad Catolica in January - but face opposition from Germany's Bayer Leverkusen.

Daily Mirror

Arsenal target Marvin Martin has signed a new deal with French side Sochaux, but revealed he has an end of season get-out clause, which could finally pave his move to the Gunners.
Metro

Real Madrid forward Cristiano Ronaldo has refused to rule out a move to big-spending Russian side Anzhi Makhachkala in the future.

Stoke have dropped defender Jonathan Woodgate from their Europa League squad because they fear long-haul trips to Ukraine, Israel and Turkey will aggravate his injury problems.
Daily Mirror

Liverpool's director of football Damien Comolli has hit back at Raul Meireles, claiming the club were forced to sell because he did not want to play for them - just like Fernando Torres.
Metro

Manchester United manager Alex Ferguson has billed his top scorer Wayne Rooney as "the white Pele."
All round


Funny newspaper stories

Some funny newspaper stories from today's tabloids ..

HARDSTORE PORN
Shoppers were shocked when a big TV showing a celeb chef cooking turned to a XXX film after the store's wi-fi was hacked in Hungary.

PRACTICAL CROAK
A hunter shot dead his prankster son-in-law, 26, when he pretended to be a wild boar among trees in Tyumen, Siberia.

WELL HUNG
Drivers called cops to report a ghostly bride hovering over a busy junction - but it turned out to be a sex doll in a wedding dress hung out by jokers in Siberia.