Some funny newspaper stories from today's tabloids ...
HEIST ON A BIKE
Fit thieves nicked two exercise bikes worth £3,000 each from Edcinburgh's Fitness First Gym.
OA-PEE BANNED
Blind pensioner Robert Simpson, 77, was yesterday banned from driving for life after he admitted causing a crash after abandoning his tractor to go to the toilet in Perth.
FOOTBALL LOVERS
One in three men admit they would ditch a lover who made them miss football to shop - and nine in ten would pay to duck match-day chores, a poll reveals.
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